Thursday, 26 September 2013

Is Pepsi OK?

How can people even ask that question? Pepsi is not OK. Pepsi is never OK. It’s like someone fizzed up nail polish remover and watered it down. It’s mainly that coke is just the go-to word for anything black and carbonated - much like the hoover and your iPod, these successful products become the given name for the entire oeuvre. And while all hoovers suck, not all cokes taste the same.

Does anyone ever say that Pepsi is not OK? I never think that it is, but I’ve never had the nuts to change my thing. ‘Actually, I think I’ll take the kick in the teeth instead.’ It’s just part of the patter, isn’t it.

I can’t help but judge an establishment that can’t get those little details right. The sort of place that puts bars of soap in a communal bathroom, Daddies ketchup on the table, or uses a Tchibo coffee machine and tries to pass it off as fancy. Second rate, that’s what that is.

The annoying thing is that they know it’s second rate - no one ever asks ‘Is Coke alright?’, it’s a self-conscious tic. A tacit admission that this establishment has failed you. Well I for one have had enough of it. I’m sick of being taken for granted by lazy outlets. Admittedly, I will not be challenging them, I shall simply order sparkling water instead.

3 comments:

  1. I feel that you should be able to buy coke and pepsi in the same place. It's annoying that one is excluded when almost everyone has a preference for one or the other. Either they should have both or they should have just coke.

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  2. I think you're right, CG. Such monopolies must be driven by Pepsi's inferiority complex, I can't imagine why they wouldn't just allow people to serve both together. Or maybe Coke is trying to take over the world. Who knows.

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  3. What I hate is "is that Diet Coke"?

    Diet coke annoys the hell out of me. Always in the way of my order. If I wanted Diet Coke, I would order it. If I didn't ask for diet Coke, yet wanted it, then I deserve to get fat. It tastes completely different, not particularly nice and I genuinely wish it had a different name.

    Even worse is when I try to order "full fat Coke" and the waitress doesn't get it.

    Regarding the Pepsi/Coke thing, in blind testing there really isn't much difference...unless you drink diet. Diet Pepsi, I'm told by fat people, is horrid. I wouldn't know.

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